Fighting Back Anger [Sermon Notes]

“Fighting Back Anger”
Dave Bartlett
Orchard Hill Church
Podcast Link

As followers of Christ, the more we learn and closer we follow then our lives ought to reflect more of Christ.

When we have problems, we don’t fight back with our power but with God’s.

All of us deal with anger.  Two types:
1.  Eruption in a moment
2. Low-grade anger that is an inch below the surface all the time

Ephesians 4:26-27
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, ²⁷ and do not give the devil a foothold.

It is a sin to act out of anger.
Not to be angry.

Ephesians 4:31-32
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. ³² Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

The answer to anger is this: Be compassionate and forgive.

We are to put off anger.  Get rid of it.

Dave’s definition of anger: Poison I drink hoping it’s going to hurt you.

A lot of us “have a right” to be angry.  Scenarios happen:

Parents leaving.

Divorce.

A boss who made promises and never followed through.

My mom never tells me she loves my.

My Dad had an affair.

Miscarriages

Grandparents who have the resources to help and choose not to.

Anger at its core is the phrase, “Somebody owes me…!”  And the problem with this is that it’s poison you drink in hopes of hurting someone else.

The only way to get rid of anger is to forgive them for what they “owe” you.  Forgiveness is really big with God.
Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us…

Matthew 18:21-22
Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”  ²² Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.

We are in a continual state of forgiving people.

This is how we fight anger.

Matthew 18:23-35 – We have a moral debt to God for our sin, wickedness, and brokenness that is never repayable.  God forgave us of that, now we must forgive those who “owe” us.

Forgiveness is a very big deal with God.  If he has forgiven us a huge pile of moral debt and then we don’t forgive our parents, sisters, or brothers then God takes that very seriously.

Practice forgiveness to get rid of anger.

What is under my anger?

1.  “You owe me.”

2.  “I’ve been hurt…”

3.  Fear.

We don’t attack anger by focusing on anger, we attack it by focusing on the hurt and fear of hurt that is beneath anger.

Change your anger through the power of Christ.  He will never leave you.

When God forgives us, it changes us.  There is nothing to earn when it comes to God’s grace and love.

You will never be able to get rid of anger and forgive others until you know that God absolutely loves you the way you are.

Forgiveness does not mean that you re-trust the person just as you did before

Just because your boss ripped you off, does not mean that you have to go back to work for him again.

Jesus did not say to forgive someone and then totally re-trust them just like before…

In regard to your anger:

1.  Identify who you are angry with.

Name the person.

2.  Determine what they “owe” you.

You can’t simply forgive in general.  You’ve got to forgive in specifics.

Specifically name what is “owed.”

3.  Cancel the debt.

You no longer owe me this thing that you never gave me anyway

Whether the person is alive or not, this can be done.

Write a letter to the person and burn it up.

This is not easy stuff, but it is important.

4.  Dismiss the case.  It’s done.

“It is finished.”

These steps are not easy, but it is the process.

Learn to forgive.

Most times, it is not helpful to go straight to the person and say, “I forgive you.”  It has the tendency to stir an argument.  Forgiveness can be done between you and God.

Ephesians 4:31-32
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. ³² Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

Tags: anger, devil, evil, faith, God, sermon